Posts Tagged ‘CHEESE’

So, this morning I got up, got ready for my doctor appointment, took my meds and had a coke. Then I realized that I had taken my night time meds, a potent cocktail of psych meds and stuff that makes me sleepy, instead of my morning meds, which do not so much with the sleepy.

This is the first time that I have ever done that.

Because, really, the two doses are nothing alike. The morning dose is, like, five pills while the night dose is a fucking fistful of drugs. And so I felt stupid because I had actually done something stupid.

So I went to the drs, stopping at UPS and the grocery store because the milk is not going to buy itself, damnit, and then came home, where I fell down on the couch and promptly fell asleep.

I woke up two hours later, ate three slices of cheese, then fell asleep on the couch again.

I have been repeating this pattern, except for the cheese, all fucking day. God only knows if I will be able to sleep tonight. If I can’t, Tim will be getting an assload of late night texts, for serious.

Made the fucking cats happy, anyway. They like me best when I don’t move around.

Things that will immediately make it clear to me that your comment is spam:

Telling me that this was a useful read. I know full well that there is very little of use to anyone on this blog, unless you want a primer on how to use the word “cunt” in casual conversation, and so starting out thanking me for information will instantly red flag you.

Using this blog to ‘practice your English’. Again, if this is the blog you have chosen to practice the English language, you are in more trouble than I can possibly help you with. SPAM.

Telling me that you tried to put me in your reader but something went wrong. The Unbearable Hotness Of Robert is on this blog like white on rice, and so everything pretty much works all the time. That is the beauty of Robert.SPAMZINI.

Putting a link in your comment. This won’t automatically get you canned, but more likely than not. My friends generally send me links in email, with a subject. SPAMTASM.

Your homepage is pharmtechcareers.com. Really, dude? Does this work on anyone? SPAMOSTIC.

Yeah, it’s pretty obvious I cleaned out the spam filter, isn’t it? I mean, the fuck with that? Does anyone fall for that shit? GAH.

If you aren ‘t doing anything right now, you should go here. No, really, it is awesome. You will like it very much, I promise.

It is the awesome project that Tim has been working on and I have been”helping”, by which I mean criticizing in a random sort of way by text in the middle of the night.

It is quite delightful, and you will love it. No, YOU WILL. Because I SAID SO.

And then it happens. “So, you have a blog? What’s it about?”

I usually answer with “I dunno . Stuff and things? With tits? Sometimes cheese?”

I’m never quite sure what to say to that question, because if this blog has a theme of any kind, the closest you could come is maybe Tracy Thinks Weird Shit.

My skill set includes sitting around, drinking, being a smart ass and having an encyclopedic knowledge of lots of stupid shit nobody can quite understand why I know. A skill set that possibly has value, but not remunerative value.

I am fascinated by lots of stuff, but there is something about the process of writing it down that leaves me befuddled and pretty sure that not a word of it makes sense.

I like books. I like food, both the making of and the eating of. I like sports, but with exception of baseball, only in a highly specialized, international, every-four-years kind of way. I am inexplicably fond of both my family and my trio of enormous, evil, geriatric cats. I like my Vespa. And cartoons.

I enjoy watching people who are the best at what they do, do what they do. And if they are competing against each other, so much the better. I like to shop, especially if I can get a bargain.

I’m pretty fucking zen.

See? IT’S A FUCKING MELANGE OF WEIRD.

I think I’m just gonna have to stick with the ‘stuff and things, with tits’ explanation. It makes more sense.

Things I have realized in the past twenty four hours:

The French are a bunch of whiny babies.

Blood sausage does not look like something I would find delicious.

I am pretty sure that Scientology is a load of bollocks.

It is impossible to have too much cheese. I don’t think you can even put those words all together in a sentence and have them still make sense.

Goddamned cat is on my hip like a fucking tumor.

I have a thing for Craig Ferguson. It’s not sexual, I just want him to come to my house and say ‘squirrel’ at me.

I have been watching Hell’s Kitchen for a few years now, and you know what? That shit NEVER GETS OLD.

Also, there is no occasion in which either noodles or barbecue is inappropriate.

Now, I have to go to bed so that I can get up at 6 tomorrow morning and watch the USA play some goddamned soccer. You go do, I don’t know, whatever you do.