Apparently, I Am Bewildering. How Cool Is THAT?
in Daily Shit
as Banalities, Fuck Off, HATE, Psycho Is The New Black
So.
I went to bed at a reasonable hour last night, only to spend the entire night tossing and turning. I can not for the life of me figure out what the fuck was going on.
It makes me very angry.
Admittedly, it really doesn’t take much, but still. There is nothing like a night of sleep disturbance to make me seriously cranky.
And now I don’t feel like I can ride my scooter to the meeting, since even with a full night of sleep I have the attention span of a three year old on a sugar binge. Lack of sleep makes me more dangerous than is acceptable.
Bah to the motherfucking humbug.
I’m Gonna Start A Clown College, Then Just Stab People As They Enroll. Oh, Don’t Act Like It Doesn’t Make TOTAL SENSE.
in Daily Shit
as Banalities, Deliciousness, Life Is Awesome, TV Is AWESOME
I went grocery shopping today and got amazing deals and saved tons of money. Then I told everyone I knew and a bunch of people on the internet how awesome I am at saving money.
It was highly gratifying.
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Tonight I made lasagna, and I’m pretty sure that I am now suffering from cheese overdose. I would never have thought such a thing possible, except I used some three pounds of cheese and that doesn’t include the ricotta. And now I’m feeling kind of logey. Shut UP, it MEANS what it SOUNDS LIKE.
It was super delicious, though. Death by cheese is a worthwhile death.
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So now, having eaten enough cheese to bind up several people permanently, I am working my way through my many hours of DVR’d TV shows. I spend so much time watching TV, and yet what the fuck with all shit I have taped? It’s crazy. I have no idea what I am spending my time on, but it certainly isn’t having an impact on the shit I have DVR’d.
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You know what would be awesome right now? Cake. Or cookies, I like cookies.
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Things I don’t eat:
Brussels Sprouts
Red Pepper
Green Pepper
Yellow Pepper
Fennel
Liver
Pickles
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I wonder how good a bowling score I could get if we were bowling with human skulls?
OK, I have to go. No, I have to go. SHUT UP. I AM GOING.
I Drove The FUCK Out Of That Element
in Daily Shit
as Banalities, Goddamned cats, Life Is Awesome, Psycho Is The New Black, Stuff I'm Going To Tell You Anyway
So, I went to Costco, I paid my bills, I got the super expensive cat food, and I am now out of money. And it’s the fifth.
*sigh*
I knew this month was going to be tight. It’s my own fault really. I ran out of a bunch of stuff last month, went through a bunch of money on holiday, and so needed to restock almost everything. Plus I forgot to pay the phone bill last month, and so had to double pay this month. And my Social Security payment did not go up this year. And if you don’t think I’m bitter about that, well, you haven’t been coming around here long, hmmm?
So this month will be all about eating at home and hanging out for no money. It’s not a huge deal, really. I was able to cover all my bills and buy food and cat stuff. I have cable and heat and paid my rent. The Vespa probably has enough gas for the month. No haircut, but again, that’s ok.
Funnily enough, I’m still very grateful. There have been times when there was no food. No rent money. And those times were incredibly hard and that shit is still happening for a lot of people. Even people who are fortunate enough to have jobs in this economy are making hard decisions about where to allot the money- health care or food? School clothes or electric bill?
All in all, a month on the downlow is not the worst thing that could happen. Plus, I’ll probably come up with at least one zany scheme over that time. Remember, both the Great Hair Unwashing Experiment of 2008 and the Great Toilet Train The Cats Experiment of 2004 came out of similar financial circumstances.
That’s what happens when I have nothing but time and an internet connection. Wily E Coyote would LOVE me.